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5 Things that Stand in the Way of Finding True Love

When it comes to finding true love, we let so many things stand in the way. In the end, WE ultimately prevent ourselves from being happy. It happens to the best of us but it’s ridiculous and absolutely unfair to become a prisoner of…yourself!

Here are 5 things that always stand in the way of finding love:

1. Pride

We can’t fathom the thought of putting ourselves out there. Love requires being vulnerable and letting our guard down and actively looking for someone NEW. We fear going the extra step for anyone because we fear rejection. We fear not being liked. We fear not getting a phone call the next day. (Is being alone better? )

The truth is, we need to let go of the pride. If you don’t put yourself out there, you’ll never get exposure and your game will NEVER improve. The goal is to get your game good and strong enough so that you’re NOT intimidated and afraid.

2. Friends

Friends only have their best interests at heart. I discussed that in an earlier post. Friends will keep you from finding someone that makes you happy because they fear losing YOU. And if they’re single.. watch out! They’ll criticize the people you choose. (No one is good enough for their friend). They’ll question your judgment and worse.. make you question your own judgment. The truth is they want happiness for themselves. They want to beat you to the happy ending. You can’t accept that.. you’ve got to come out on top!

3. Fear of Commitment

We fear being tied down to someone because we fear losing ourselves. We fear losing our youth, our friends, our family, our hobbies. The thought of devoting our time and attention to someone other than ourselves makes us feel as though we’re losing who we are. We fear being trapped and not being able to do what WE want when we want to do it. Seriously?

Being in love doesn’t mean you have to let go of who you are and it doesn’t mean you should lose your life AT ALL. Instead, it should feel like you’re sharing your life with someone. P.S. If it feels less than, you haven’t found the one…

4. The ugly past

We become victims of our past. Bad experiences make us fearful of reliving them. We were cheated on, we were physically abused, we were emotionally abused…. so we hold every POTENTIAL partner accountable. Umm.. it’s not their fault. They shouldn’t have to pay for someone else’s mistakes.

P.S. The more suspicious we are of people, the more we question, the more we compare… the more likely we are to push them away and the more likely they are to run away FOR GOOD.

5. Our parents mistakes

We fear becoming our parents. If our parents (or whoever it was that raised us) experienced a failed marriage, divorce, physical abuse, or single parenting (ughh), we fear becoming THEM. We fear failure. We fear being sad, hurt or… broke.

You are NOT your parents, so quit making excuses. Get on your feet and start looking for love..! You deserve it…

Women 101: What Men Want to Know About Women

Men and women are completely different species. We behave differently. We express ourselves differently. We communicate differently. Everyone knows that…But why do we still have such a hard time relating? Part of the problem is that we don’t really accept that we’re different. Instead we get annoyed with each other and criticize the way we handle things. The classic book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus does an excellent job of explaining this… better than I ever will. (P.S. It’s a MUST read for every man and woman).

Men and women are different. Fact. But there’s no reason to let different get in the way of a relationship. Women experience things men NEVER do just like men experience things a woman will never understand.

This is a pretty huge topic to discuss in one post but let me address 6 questions men always seem to ask:

1. Why do women talk so much?

Talking relieves anxiety. Somehow it makes us feel better. Most of the times we’re not even sure why we’re talking, we just need to get it out of our system. We need to vent and we need you to listen. OK, so maybe we abuse your ears more than we should…Point taken. But we can’t go about our day with all this information in our heads and NOT let it out. We don’t need you to solve our problems… we’re not looking for a solution. We just need you to actively listen.

P.S. You’ll want to make sure you do tune in when a woman is talking. If you don’t, there are plenty of men out there who are dying to lend a helping ear.

2. Why do women take so long to get ready? 

We need to look our best at all times. There is KILLER competition out there. We can’t afford to have a hair out of place or feel any less of a woman when other women are on the prowl. We don’t want you looking at other women and thinking they’re better than US.

P.S. If you want your woman to keep up with her appearance and you want to be able to show her off (which we know you do)… it’s probably in your best interest to be patient and wait.

3. Why do women go to the bathroom in groups? 

No, we’re not having an orgy fest in the bathroom. (I hate to break it to you). The truth is, the walk to the bathroom is the LONGEST walk on earth. Men stare and we…feel self-conscious. Which just increases our chances of possibly tripping and falling flat on our face. The thought terrifies us and it’s a chance we are NOT willing to take.

4. Why are women so CRAZY? 

This is probably the most popular question of all. For starters, don’t ever CALL a woman crazy because the minute you do, you’re guaranteed to call OUT the crazy in her.  We don’t like to refer to our feelings as crazy. What men see as a sign of complete insanity is what women would simply label as emotional. Yes, women can often be OVERemotional and we often overreact. (I never said we were rational). We go with emotions and feelings, because well….that’s what our hormones do. We can’t control the estrogen, just like you can’t control the anger that often accompanies testosterone.

5. Why are women so jealous?

Other women = competition. We don’t like competition. The way we see it, there are very FEW men to go around and way too many women. We can’t afford to lose a good one once we’ve reeled him in. You should feel honored when a woman feels those type of emotions for you. It’s a compliment. She sees something in you she’s simply NOT willing to pass up.

6. Why do women always pout their lips? 

My personal favorite. The truth is…Secretly every woman wants to be a porn star. Porn stars pout their lips and men are sexually ATTRACTED to porn stars. In fact, men ditch spending time with their women to watch porn  (a topic for another post). It’s almost as though we’re forced to COMPETE with these women, too! Ugh..

The point is, the more you understand about the opposite sex the easier it is to RELATE. Men and women express themselves differently but it’s no reason to let it affect a relationship, or worse, forego being in one altogether. You’ll end up a bachelor for life, and…. you don’t want that…  Find true love !

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